I haven’t had a period since March 22, so my Husband prompted me to take a pregnancy test. I knew I wasn’t pregnant. I knew I was approaching menopause. Menopause is defined by not having a period for a full year, so technically, I am in perimenopause.
I don’t quite understand why this topic is still so taboo. I once asked some middle-aged women for some tips, and they were appalled that I would even suggest they were menopausal. Is it because it signals we are no longer youthful? Is it sadness about losing our reproductive capabilities? Is it a societal pressure not to age? Whatever the reason, I validate your feelings, but since all women reach this stage, I’d like to discuss it.
Menopause and Migraine
I have had a daily, all-day, every-day migraine since June 20, 2018. I’ll be celebrating 7 years of resilience! For the most part, it’s an invisible disability until it isn’t. I was at a conference function and hit the wall hard, so I called an Uber. I could not figure out the directions to meet the driver and ended up walking back with other conference attendees. I could barely walk, talk, and I’m sure the person who stayed with me thought I was intoxicated. I had Bell’s Palsy when I was 17, so when the migraine hits hard, my right side droops. In fact, when this migraine presented 7 years ago, it came on like a stroke.
I haven’t been feeling this migraine as much as I used to. Could it be that the lack of estrogen in my body is a good thing? I considered trying hormone replacement therapy, but my Neurologist felt it could make things worse. After all, I could not handle birth control pills in my 20s or fertility drugs in my 30s.
Unfortunately, migraine gets worse for some women. When I was in that state, I tried occipital nerve blocks, sphenopalantine nerve blocks, botox, gabapentin, SSRIs, naproxen, Imitrex, and every CGRP that came to market to no avail. I considered applying for MAID because my migraine was so bad that my face hurt, and I could not deal. So my Doctor relented and gave me T3s just for some quality of life.
I still live in my sunglasses, need to go to bed abruptly, and some days can be very silent, but menopause for me is signaling freedom.
Say Good-Bye to Aunt Flow
I am not going to miss the monthly period. During a D&C, it was discovered I had fibroids and endometriosis. No wonder I lived with a heat wrap around my belly. I was bleeding to death. The crimson tide was so bad that I became bedridden for 3 days each month and couldn’t even think of leaving the house. Black panties became my thing, and I slept with a towel underneath to save our sheets.
Even ovulation wasn’t pleasant. I would lose that week to a migraine. 2 weeks a month, I was losing to the hormonal cycle. Good riddance!
Sexy Time
We don’t have biological children, so I can’t speak to losing the fear of pregnancy. But I know several women who have found a sexual freedom in knowing they could not become pregnant by having sex. Who knew women could have sex for reasons other than procreation? Is this the reason many women enjoy multiple orgasms later in life? Bravo ladies!!!
The downside to our sexual health is that without that estrogen, our lady bits become thin and are susceptible to tearing. Make sure to use a lubricant. The phrase “use it or lose it” also applies. I know our libidos wane in this era, but without sex, our vaginas will atrophy making sex painful when it does happen.
Menopause and Sepsis
I was this many days old when I learned there was a connection between menopause and sepsis. It turns out that estrogen plays a role in keeping our urinary tract healthy. So if you’re in this era and getting a lot of UTIs, this is the reason. Be mindful of your symptoms because that UTI can become sepsis, which is an emergency and life-threatening. In fact, sepsis damages the kidneys more often than any other organ in the body.
Midlife Glam
I thought I would be sad about becoming menopausal, but I feel the opposite. It’s kind of like being a teenager again, but with life experience, so you’re not as stupid. The kids are grown, so you have time for yourself.
You have confidence, so you’re not as controlled by what other people think of you. In my 20s, I wouldn’t get the mail without full hair and makeup. Now I frequently run errands with a fresh face. Plus, let’s be real, the makeup we did when we were younger no longer works. My friend turned me onto make-up artist Erica Taylor. She specializes in makeup for mature women, and she’s hilarious!
Remember, perimenopause is like hitting puberty again but backwards. Instead of a flood of hormones, we’re losing hormones. Don’t be afraid to hit up your Doctor for a prescription for when the rages or crying happens, and it will! There are many herbal remedies, but no proof that they are helpful or even good to ingest.
My friend works for BC Cannabis, so I asked her if there was a strain to help us overcome the insomnia without feeling hungover the next day. This is the strain she recommends. It’s called 3:2:1 K.O. Oil.
You’ve never had time before, so learn to take deep breaths, ground yourself, and get ready to live your best life!
